Saturday, July 30, 2005
dearest 'you',
i was thinking.
plainly thinking of how things gonna turned up if they are not how they are right now. was touching a little on the past when everything seems to be perfectly fine. when we were young and innocent and that everything we did, seem to be all rite.
now..
maybe i shud put it as history is repeating itself. this time around, slightly different from wat had happened the last time thoe. still, i do feel the hurt at times..cos, due to some unforeseen circumstances, all beautiful things decided to end.
seriously, i'm missing you. you who have entered my life and turning it into a beautiful, enjoyable one. you who have seen me grow from a nobody till whom or even wat am i now. you, who laughed and cried with me. its just so nice to have you around, not to mention the company. nevertheless, i guess..those were years back rite? when things were so easy for us to compute. when we could just open up to each other and heck over things or wat others have to say. i'm sure that you will agree with me that things are definitely different now. that we are no longer who we were last time and that no matter how much effort we tried to put in, situations cannot be back to how we dreamt it would be.
i do not want to lie to myself or even to you. i do not wana pretend to be somebody i'm not. i dun noe, im confused..so confused with myself. i do not know how to open myself up to you anymore. moreover, i dun seems to care or even bother if things between us does not seems to work out. maybe i'm still hurt over the broken past we've been true. years of being drifted apart from one another. not noeing a single clue about each other. tell you something, its hard to pick up pieces of broken glasses. i noe this may sound crazy..but i use to love you so much. even much more than a fren. but i guess things are rather neutral now. and i had chose to let things be, the way as it is now. lets things lay low between us. i am so sorry if i had hurt you in one way or another. its unintentional but i just cant seems to find myself or understand what we both want..
let us just be frens.
thoe i don't deny that i miss ya.
from your fren,
Ana
toodles.
